Battle of the Bands - Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals

The Band screeches to a halt sideways through the lemures outside the doors to the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals.

A small potbellied imp named Pipyap sticks his head out of the front door of the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals and shouts, “Next in line!” 

The Band, Mordakai and Orianna step forward  into the building and be seen for their permits.

The inside of the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals is a cathedral of bureaucracy. Imps violently fill out endless forms as a profusely sweating, scowling fiend behind a massive desk shouts across the large room, “Customer one trillion forty-five, please step right up, I haven’t got all day!” At the foot of the desk is a sleeping three-headed hell hound, and sitting on the wall behind the fiend is a massive three-eyed pit fiend.

The fiend behind the desk is a cambion fiend named Darnious.

Darnious is a semi-professional musician who plays the fiddle.

Three three headed hell hounds lole and sleep near the desk and Darnious.

The fiend bellows out rudely that they have not got all day, and what do you ants want.

After being told that they need a “rock-off permit.” 

Darnious enquires on who they are wanting to "rock-off" against, as "as you know a  rock-off permit allows the bearer to challenge anyone in Avernus to a rock-off, so who do you want to challenge?", which the party evade and give vague references.

After Darnious inquisitiveness is quelled, he informs them that the band, as they requested the rock off permit, must submit a hair follicle, their shoe size, their eye color, and wait 120 days for a background check.

But the background check is waived if the requesters submits a single drop of blood each. 

The band are about to submit to all of this, when a deep voice in their head.

"I HAVE ANOTHER WAY, A FASTER WAY, FOR YOU TO GET YOUR PERMIT"

The band look confused, but then a contract appears in their hands....

Orianna and Mordakai are more than happy to help the band sign and fulfill the infernal contract

Which after much review, and realising they do not need to give a Deamon their Blood for it, they oblige.

Bardo insults and challenges Darnious to a rock off.

Bardo along with the desk gets flipped backwards, as Darnious roars and picks up his fiddle.

The Rock Off has started

Dogs of war and men of hate

With no cause, we don't discriminate

Discovery is to be disowned

Our currency is flesh and bone

Hell opened up and put on sale

Gather 'round and haggle

For hard cash, we will lie and deceive

Even our masters don't know the webs we weave

One world, it's a battleground

One world, and we will smash it down

One world

One world

Some of the band manage to bring out their Rock Avatars before the onslaught

Darnious and the three hell hounds go not for such things, and rush them straight

Gnashing and gnoring

Headbutting and fire breathing

The Band is on the back foot, straight away

When one of the hell hounds attacks not the avatar but Hydraca directly!

Bad form

Hydraca complains telepathically to Dee O (the Pit Fiend), who booms in their heads.

"I WILL HAVE TO LOOK INTO THAT RULE, NOW QUITE FLAPPING AND KILL HIM"

Quite a few close calls, a hell hound is sent to sleep.

Some of the Band almost die.

But then the Band rallied and started working together.

The Other two Hell Hounds fell in quick succession, one by Cloudah.

Leaving Darnious, backing away from Cloudah where Xlixi provided the final blow.

Bardo then cu de graed the Sleeping Hell Hound

And their bodies transformed into Soul Coins.

Soul Coin

Soul coins are about 5 inches across and about an inch thick, minted from infernal iron. Each coin weighs one-third of a pound, and is inscribed with Infernal writing and a spell that magically binds a single soul to the coin. Because each soul coin has a unique soul trapped within it, each has a story. A creature might have been imprisoned as a result of defaulting on a deal, while another might be the victim of a night hag's curse.

Carrying Soul Coins. To hold a soul coin is to feel the soul bound within it — overcome with rage or fraught with despair.

An evil creature can carry as many soul coins as it wishes (up to its maximum weight allowance). A nonevil creature can carry a number of soul coins equal to or less than its Constitution modifier without penalty. A non-evil creature carrying a number of soul coins greater than its Constitution modifier has disadvantage on its attack rolls, ability checks, and saving throws.

Using a Soul Coin. A soul coin has 3 charges. A creature carrying the coin can use its action to expend 1 charge from a soul coin and use it to do one of the following:

Drain Life. You siphon away some of the soul's essence and gain 1d10 temporary hit points.

Query. You telepathically ask the soul a question and receive a brief telepathic response. which you can understand. The soul knows only what it knew in life, but it must answer you truthfully and to the best of its ability. The answer is no more than a sentence or two and might be cryptic.

Freeing a Soul. Casting a spell that removes a curse on a soul coin frees the soul trapped within it, as does expending all of the coin's charges. The coin itself rusts from within and is destroyed once the soul is released. A freed soul travels to the realm of the god it served or the outer plane most closely tied to its alignment (DM's choice). The souls of lawful evil creatures released from soul coins typically emerge from the River Styx as lemure devils.

A soul can also be freed by destroying the coin that contains it. A soul coin has AC 19, 1 hit point for each charge it has remaining, and immunity to all damage except that which is dealt by a hellfire weapon or an infernal war machine's furnace.

Freeing a soul from a soul coin is considered a good act, even if the soul belongs to an evil creature.

Hellish Currency. Soul coins are a currency of the Nine Hells and are highly valued by devils. The coins are used among the infernal hierarchy to barter for favors, bribe the unwilling. and reward the faithful for services rendered.

The Pit Fiend DeeO at this provides the Band with

• A one-time, non-exclusive, non-transferable permit for a rock-off
• A gem encrusted cli lyre possessed by one (See Soul Coin for effect but without it being Hellish Currency.
• A Huge stained-glass window of Zariel holding a massive guitar signed by the Archduke herself, the value of the aforesaid stained-glass window being 5,000 gp
  
  
  

Mordakai and Orianna then step forward from the shadows eating popcorn, do a funny hand shake with DeeO and get their renewal without question.

The band try to negotiate with the Pit Fiend for the value of the stained glass, not the huge stained glass thing itself

But Dee O is just pleased that someone has taken it off his hands, and really does not want such a breakable thing back

They do manage to convince Mordakai to take it and use it as a battle banner, in exchange for him taking them as close to the front lines of the Deamon war, so they can challenge Orcus to a Rock Off