Battle of the Bands - Tasha's deal

The band head back to the dressing room, where they meet a lady with a large cauldron floating behind her.

That was quite the show! Allow me to introduce myself, for you might know me as Natasha the Dark, Hura of Ket, Baba Yaga’s daughter, or many other regal titles, but you may address me as Tasha. You see, I require the talents of a bard such as yourself, so please, come with me, there is much to discuss.

With that a door that was not there opens up, and she heads through it with the band following.

The streets look the same and have the normal familiarity of them, but there is a shadowy shimmer to them as you walk with Tasha.

"I belong to a group of powerful heroes seeking to find the greatest champions throughout the multiverse.


For example, Mordenkainen the wizard has already discovered a blood hunter. It is my turn now to find heros of equal or greater skill.

The quest I have for you is the greatest and best quest of all time—although it is likely to lead to your death if you are not careful, since it involves the eternal conflict between demons and devils known as the Blood War"

The look of shock on the band is palatable, and they start stuttering.. 

"Your quest is this: go to Avernus, the first layer of the Nine Hells, and defeat the Demon Lord Orcus, the Prince of Undeath. 

Zariel, the Archduke of Avernus, is losing ground to the hordes of demons under Orcus’s command. 

If the demons overrun the Nine Hells, they’ll win the Blood War. The Material Plane shall fall next and all other planes soon afterward. 

Orcus honors the ancient and forgotten demon code that has only one rule: demons must accept any challenge to a rock-off."

The band goes a pale...

"Here is what you must do to complete this quest, so please listen carefully!

When you get to Avernus, you must go to the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals to obtain a rock-off permit. Those devils and their bureaucracies are no joke! (Zariel recently merged these two departments. Government budget cuts, am I right?)

Once you have the permit, you must travel amidst the ravenous battlefields in Avernus to seek out and challenge Orcus. If you defeat him in the rock-off, you can banish him back to the Abyss.

I’ll be watching you. The fate of the Blood War and the multiverse lies in your hands. Now, jump into my cauldron of everything and you’ll be teleported to the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals."

With that the band seem to regain some sensibility, and state that they owe Vivian Eastwood money and that they need to pay her before the interest rate cripples them.

They manage to barter with Tasha that with a signed document, she can collect the money due from the vendors and pay off Vivian Eastwood and get this debit off their necks.

Tasha agrees and urges the band to jump into the cauldron.

Which they do scared out of their wits!


Tasha’s cauldron of everything teleports the band to Avernus, the first layer of the Nine Hells. The Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals is a massive red metal structure with enormous spikes protruding from the sides and fiery flames blasting out of the roof into the sky. The line outside of this building is composed of 10,000 lemures patiently waiting to go inside.

The teleportation into Avernus is a violent experience as you plummet to hell at incredible speeds while enveloped in a protective shield. As they crash toward the ground like a meteor, they blast through a black sphere of darkness above a floating city anchored to the ground by eight massive chains. 

As they exit the dark sphere, you spiral in the sky and shatter the eight chains anchoring the floating city before crash into the ground leaving a crater and bodies of 200 lemures around them, where the protective shield vanishes.

The band arrive at the end of a long line of lemures waiting outside the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals. 

The dark sphere above vanishes and a planetar emerges, gives you a massive thumbs up, then lifts the floating city out of hell on their shoulders. 

Congratulations, you’ve just completed Baldur’s Gate: Descent into Avernus! Bad news is you are now waiting in a long line at the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals, ewww


The band start queuing up and chat with a dwarf in line who tells them he has been waiting 10 years, but the line seems to be moving faster now.

The band estimate it will take 5 years to get the front of the queue, they are questioning the dwarf about who he knows and if there is a way to short cut the queue when an arrow tip appears through his mouth and he flops forward to reveal two teiflings.

Who introduce themselves (without even acknowledging what they just done to the dwarf) as the Mafisto Twins

"This is a first. I’ve only ever seen lemures waiting in this forsaken line. Sorry for being rude, my name is Orianna Mafisto, and here is my brother, Mordakai Mafisto. What is your name, and what are you doing here?

The band chat with the twins and after some back and forth, Mordakai runs off to fetch something.

Meanwhile the band perform for Orianna and notice that the lemures get of line to watch and listen to the band, giving them opportunity to cut the line a little bit.

A distant rumble is heard


Mordakai returns driving his demon grinder named The Soulless Hag since its hull is painted with a fiendish night hag casting a soul siphoning spell.

"Hop on, lets get this party started" he 'said'

"No, you’re not imagining things… I am the voice in your head. It’s me, Mordakai.

I fought off ten million demons with my bare hands! Too bad I lost my jaw and tongue, I really liked those. (Mordakai stares off into the distance when he says this.)

I hate these lemures! I’ll never get to the front lines if I have to wait in this line.

On my way over here I used The Soulless Hag to run over tons of demons like little meat sacks, ha! I wonder what that did to my paint job… Hmm.

I can give you a ride to the front lines if you help us out. You can even perform while we ride into battle, hell yea!"

The band jump on and start playing

Minor incident with Bardo falling off mid performance, and a few bum notes from some of the band, but the lemures are getting distracted as they move slowly down the line

The band chat with Mordakai and ask if there is a quicker way through.

"Oh you want to cut the line..... Sure"

With that The Soulless Hag lets out a roar as the gear is kicked up a notch.


Then they churn through the lemures with blood and viscera flying everywhere, Xlixi goes green and starts vomiting, but on each inhale, he is breathing in blood and viscera and vomiting more and more, which cause the rest of the band to go green and retch.

In no time they have cut through the line quite literally, 10,000 corpses in a blood red track of viscera and bone pathed the way to the massive red metal structure with enormous spikes protruding from the sides and fiery flames blasting out of the roof into the sky, the band arrive at the doors to the Department of Diabolical Performing Arts and Infernal War Machine License Renewals.

-----------------------------------

Oh while the band were being transported they became attuned to the attire they were wearing.............

Clodagh

Living Dress of Scintillating Colors

This dress is formed from black chitin, beneath which veins pulse and red sinews glisten

To attune to this item, you must wear it for the entire attunement period, during which tendrils on the inside burrow into you.

This dress has 3 charges, and it regains 1d3 expended charges daily at dawn. While you wear it, you can use an action and expend 1 charge to cause the garment to display a shifting pattern of dazzling hues until the end of your next turn. During this time, the dress sheds bright light in a 30-foot radius and dim light for an additional 30 feet. Creatures that can see you have disadvantage on attack rolls against you. In addition, any creature in the bright light that can see you when the dress's power is activated must succeed on a DC 15 Wisdom saving throw or become stunned until the effect ends.

Symbiotic Nature. 

The dress can't be removed from you while you're attuned to it, and you can't voluntarily end your attunement to it. If you're targeted by a spell that ends a curse, your attunement to the  dress ends, and it drops from you (Yes you will end up naked!).

The  dress requires fresh blood be fed to it. Immediately after you finish any long rest, you must either feed half of your remaining Hit Dice to the  dress (round up) or take 1 level of exhaustion. 

Bardo

Living Armor

This armor is formed from black chitin, beneath which veins pulse and red sinews glisten. To attune to this item, you must wear it for the entire attunement period, during which tendrils on the inside burrow into you.

While wearing this armor, you have a +1 bonus to Armor Class, and you have resistance to the following damage types: necrotic, poison, and psychic.

Symbiotic Nature. 

The armour can't be removed from you while you're attuned to it, and you can't voluntarily end your attunement to it. If you're targeted by a spell that ends a curse, your attunement to the armour ends, and it detaches from you (Yes you will end up naked!).

The armour requires fresh blood be fed to it. Immediately after you finish any long rest, you must either feed half of your remaining Hit Dice to the armour (round up) or take 1 level of exhaustion. 

Xlixi

Ruidium Armour

This magic armour has a dull, rusty color or has veins of ruidium running through it. While you wear this armour, you gain the following benefits:

You have resistance to psychic damage.

You can breathe water.

You gain a swimming speed equal to your walking speed.

Ruidium Corruption. 

When you roll a 1 on a saving throw while wearing this armor, you must make a DC 15 Charisma saving throw. On a failed save, you gain 1 level of exhaustion. If you are not already suffering from ruidium corruption, you become corrupted when you fail this save.

If Ruidium Is Destroyed.  

If the Apotheon is killed or redeemed, all of the ruidium in Exandria is destroyed instantly, and Ruidium Armor becomes +1 Armor.

The armor can't be removed from you while you're attuned to it, and you can't voluntarily end your attunement to it. If you're targeted by a spell that ends a curse, your attunement to the armor ends, and it detaches from you (Yes you will end up naked!). 

Hieronymo

Hell Hound Cloak

This dark cloak is made of cured hell hound hide. As an action, you can command the cloak to transform you into a hell hound for up to 1 hour. The transformation otherwise functions as the Polymorph spell, but you can use a bonus action to revert to your normal form.

Curse.

This cloak is cursed with the essence of a hell hound, and becoming attuned to it extends the curse to you. Until the curse is broken with Remove Curse or similar magic, you are unwilling to part with the cloak, keeping it within reach at all times.

The sixth time you use the cloak, and each time thereafter, you must make a DC 15 Charisma saving throw. On a failed save, the transformation lasts until dispelled or until you drop to 0 hit points, and you can't willingly return to normal form. If you ever remain in hell hound form for 6 hours, the transformation becomes permanent and you lose your sense of self. All your statistics are then replaced by those of a hell hound. Thereafter, only Remove Curse or similar magic allows you to regain your identity and return to normal. If you remain in this permanent form for 6 days, only a wish spell can reverse the transformation.

Hell Hound

  • Armor Class 15 (Natural Armor)
  • Hit Points 45
  • Speed 50 ft.
  • STR 17 (+3) 
  • DEX 12 (+1) 
  • CON 14 (+2) 
  • INT 6 (-2) 
  • WIS 13 (+1) 
  • CHA 6 (-2)
  • Skills Perception +5
  • Damage Immunities Fire
  • Senses Darkvision 60 Ft., passive Perception 15
  • Languages Understands Infernal But Can't Speak It

Traits

  • Keen Hearing and Smell: The hound has advantage on Wisdom (Perception) checks that rely on hearing or smell.
  • Pack Tactics: The hound has advantage on an attack roll against a creature if at least one of the hound's allies is within 5 ft. of the creature and the ally isn't incapacitated.

Actions

  • Bite: Melee Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 7 (1d8 + 3) piercing damage plus 7 (2d6) fire damage.
  • Fire Breath (Recharge 5-6): The hound exhales fire in a 15-foot cone. Each creature in that area must make a DC 12 Dexterity saving throw, taking 21 (6d6) fire damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one.

Hydrica

Armor of Fire Resistance

You have resistance to fire damage while you wear this armour.

Curse. 

This armour is cursed and the wearer is vulnerable to cold damage.

The armour can't be removed from you while you're attuned to it, and you can't voluntarily end your attunement to it. If you're targeted by a spell that ends a curse, your attunement to the armour ends, and it detaches from you (Yes you will end up naked!).


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